So you wanted a post?

So a few days go by without a post, and all the readers (both of you) give me hard time.

Alright... we finally got the season underway, with a doubleheader in Hyde Park. The field was a little muddy... no, not muddy... covered with random patches of water... if by random you mean home plate, the pitcher's mound, and second base. But we made do with a field where the bases were definitely not the regulation 65 feet apart. That said, Joe decided the field wasn't un-regulation enough, and tried to move home plate to his liking on his first at bat (first game, 7th inning; Joe doesn't regularly check his email to find out game times). That's good work, Joe.

We took to the field first in both games as our opponents were short people to begin the game. Brian handled the pitching duties for both games, coming away with a win and a loss. In the informal post-game analysis, we decided we didn't play as well in our second game as we did in the first... so going forward, we may need to play an unofficial scrimmage ahead of our official game, just to get in the swing of things.

Sunday's games showed us yet more insight into the world of the rec league ump. Our ump called a fairly wide strike zone... while standing off at a 45 degree angle to the plate... although at one point I'm pretty sure he was standing between the catcher and the batter. He also seemed to decide close calls by alternately ruling in favor of the team he last ruled against. The most memorable of these plays was Ryan getting called out on what should have been a home run. I think you all remember that play, where Casey "Ryan" Jones drove that freight train towards the plate despite the third base coach waving him off. No, that was last year... he should have been safe this time, except the ump had just ruled a ball as a strike, so he decided to make a call for the other team.

I think the rust from a long off-season came through in this came, as we witnessed:

• Basil's inability to understand what the score was (despite holding the clipboard)
• Basil's inability to distinguish between Brian and Eagle; that said, a player from the other team asked them if they were brothers... and another player from the other team asked them if they were twins
  
• Basil's inability to understand a joke made at Brian's expense by Lindsey, even when it was repeated solely for his benefit

Wait--who's writing this? In any case, we also saw:

• Joe's ability to do a double axel while playing rightfield. As majestic as it was, it took away from his ability to field the ball, as he ended up splayed out on the grass with the ball lying a couple feet away from his inert body.
• Brian's ability to give Joe a hard time for figure-skating routine. Only to follow in the steps of a baserunner coming in from third and take an unexplainable digger, allowing a run to score.

That said, we did have some highlights from our games on Sunday. We had a fascinating opportunity for a 9-6-4-5-1 out, which didn't materialize because we were all too mystified by a batter's attempt for an in-the-park home run on a shallow outfield hit. Which made sense--in retrospect--due to the automatic out they were going to accrue. To quickly recap our other highlights: (crickets)

I keed! No, we actually got it together during our second game. The bats were active, the fielding was good, yadda, yadda, but that doesn't make for as much fun of a blog. Or perhaps I just forgot because it's been a couple days. On to the honors...

Eagle gets a game ball for running all over the outfield and his 1.00 OBP. Nice work, Eags. In an unrelated note, if anyone has access to a cheap oxygen tank--or knows a good deal on a gym membership--please send me an email.

Per the byrules of our slow pitch softball team's charter, the following people owe the team a pitcher of beer:

• Dave (strikeout)
• Joe (strikeout)
• Someone else (strikeout?)
  

(Editor's note: I have no idea what that picture linked to above has in relationship to "slow pitch softball team's charter", but that was the third Google image result for that search term).

There's the round-up. Sorry for the delay, but you can't rush this kind of journalistic quality (feel free to nominate me for any meritorious journalistic awards with large cash prizes).

Looking forward to June 17th at 10:30am in Hyde Park,

I remain,

El Capitan

Fun Fact:
- Apparently eye black does work. But it has to be the grease kind, not the tape kind. Not that this mattered on Sunday, what with the overcast skies.